34, of Tracy, California.
McCaffrey died in Balad, Iraq, when enemy forces ambushed his ground patrol. He was assigned to the Army National Guard's 579th Engineer Battalion, Petaluma, California. Died on June 22, 2004.
McCaffrey was promoted to Sergeant in June, 2004.
Please send information, photos, and corrections for Army Sgt. Patrick R. McCaffrey, Sr..
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"Mac,
I remember the first time I met you. Woodard made you guys stick your weapons out the window, he said he wanted your vehicles to look like a porcupine. Your hit a pole and bent in half, it was so funny to me, I still have that picture we took in the TOC. I couldn't help but laugh and you were so pissed off. Your deaths is my greatest failure. I think about that day all the time and it haunts my dreams. You spoke often of your kids and wife and the day you died, I failed them too. I will never for you and Andre, I will never let others forget."
CPT Eva Foster, TF Tacoma of Fort Huachuca, AZ
"To My Fallen Comrade / N. P. (Friend, Soldier )
To my fallen commrade
The hardest thing to envision was the loss of a friend and a fellow platoon member. The hardest thing that hit me was the rollcall that you would no longer be among us. From that day on it took all my strength both physically and emotionally to make it through. You Lt Tyson and SFC Ottolini are our loss and we will never forget. Your compassion for taking care of others your big heart your infectious personality you were always steady and firm and 2nd Platoon could always count on you. Even though you have left us we still feel as you have never left. Patrick you are still our guardian angel watching over us and your family wherever we are. Your one-hundred brothers will never forget you Lt. Tyson and SFC Ottolini.
— 2ndPlt member"
2ndPlt member of USA
"Lawn of the Folded Flags
Tuesday February 23, 2010
By Brigid Brett
It’s a perfect Oceanside day: wispy clouds moving across a blue gray sky and just enough wind to keep blowing over the plastic vases I’ve brought to put the red and white roses in. Eventually I give up and lay the flowers on the stone, framing his name.
PATRICK RYAN MCCAFFREY.
SGT US ARMY.
MAY 26 1970. JUNE 22 2004.
BRONZE STAR. PURPLE HEART. OPERATION IRAQI FREEDOM.
REDSKINS FOREVER.
Two summers ago I visited Patrick’s grave at the Lawn of the Folded Flags with his son Patrick Junior. Nearly 13, with smooth brown skin, dark eyes and a dimpled smile, he already looked like the photos I’d seen of his father. And four years after his dad’s death he still spoke about him as if he was still alive, saying things like, “My dad and me, our favorite movie is Black Hawk Down. We’ve watched it hundreds of times together.”
I watched Junior walk around the stone where his dad was buried and then kneel down and run his fingers over its smooth cool surface. He took a piece of paper out of the pocket of his shorts, folded it tightly and buried in the earth near his father.
Later he told me what he’d written: Dad, this is Patrick. I’m promise I will stay out of trouble. I want to make you proud of me. I miss you.
There were little stickers all over the gravestone. Junior’s younger sister Janessa who lives in Oceanside had pasted them there. Tiny hearts, glittery statues of liberty, American flags.
Today the stickers have faded into blurry white shapes that I trace with my fingers.
I never met Patrick McCaffrey but I’ve met a lot of people who have and they all say what a good man he was and how badly they miss him. When I stayed with his mom Nadia at her home in Tracy, California, I slept in the room that Patrick put together Junior and Janessa to stay in when they visit their grandma. I slept in their bunk bed, surrounded by Lion King pillows and a beady eyed teddy bear wearing a knitted American flag vest and a poster of Nicholas Cage in Windtalkers.
The next morning Nadia made creamy scrambled eggs and told me, in that rich French accent of hers, about the time she and Patrick lived in Tahiti for a year and a half when he was eleven and twelve . They went barefoot and ate breadfruit cooked over an open fire and Patrick learned to kayak and windsurf and deep sea fish and charmed the locals and the tourists. While I sipped my coffee and savored my eggs, she told me how Patrick learned the history of the island and how he’d team up with some of the taxi drivers and take tourists on tours of the island, showing them the waterfalls and sacrificial sites. Although he never charged for these tours he’d usually get tips that he’d bring home to his mom.
“I picture him in Tahiti I think, more often than anywhere else,” Nadia said, a distant look in her eyes.
Now I sit on the lawn by Patrick’s grave and notice how tall the nearby tree has grown and think of Patrick’s mom. The last time we spoke I could hear the deep weariness in her voice. Weariness from her body and its continual large and small betrayals. And weariness from wanting to do more, always more, for the young Iraq and Afghanistan veterans who reach out to her each day.
I take out the email I’ve printed from John Keith, a young vet with PTSD who lives in Texas.
“Patrick, everyone says that you’re the guy who was always there for them, who would do anything to help anyone. Well, listen to what your mom’s been up to,” I say. Then I read part of John’s email out loud. The tiny American flags around the soldiers’ graves flutter in the wind.
I am a disabled Iraq War Veteran. I was on an aircraft carrier during Operation Iraqi Freedom. After returning I suffered a 12 ft fall, breaking my ankle in several places, breaking my back in three places and suffered a TBI (traumatic brain injury.) After getting medically retired my case was handed over to the Department of Veteran Affairs. I was awarded 60% disability compensation, which equates to $900 a month. After struggling with this situation for three years I became very suicidal and depressed.
I wrote a letter asking for help, and sent it to every Veteran Organization, Senator, Congressman and anyone else I could think of that might listen. That is when I met Nadia McCaffrey. She was a very refreshing person to have in my life. She automatically made me feel at ease. She actually listened to me and was genuinely concerned about my situation. She became proactive in getting me to appointments with the VA, and that is when I stopped thinking about suicide every day…..
She’s not only my friend, but I consider her a mother as well….
I fold up the email and put it back in my bag. I watch people in black clothes leave a distant gravesite and walk up the hill to their cars. I pour some water on Patrick’s gravestone and scrub it with the small yellow towel I’ve brought for this purpose. I picture Junior the first time I met him, in his red and black football cleats, impatient to get out on the field.
Then I remember how he’d pointed to the raised REDSKINS FOREVER letters on his dad’s stone the day we visited him together. “See here? Me and my dad are big Redskin fans. I’m going to keep playing football and I’m going to be really good at it, because I know that’s what he wants.” Then his eyes started to tear up and he looked away and started chewing on the inside of his cheek.
Before I leave Eternal Hills I call Nadia. I know how much it hurts her to be so far from where her only child is buried. She picks up after one ring and I tell her where I am. I hear her swallow.
“Is it raining there?” she asks.
I tell her the sun is shining. It’s peaceful here on the Lawn of the Folded Flags, I say. And although Patrick is so far from you, he’s surrounded by his band of brothers, by all the other warriors from all the different wars.
“Yes,” she says, so softly I can barely hear her."
Brigid Brett of CA
"I never want to forget the sacrifices of so many young men and women. I am so proud it makes me cry. I understand in theory only that war is a part of human nature but so is love and caring. I wish I could take the families pain away but I can't. I am committed to loving ALL people, myself and our environment. I am committed to working on my happiness everyday because so many have died for my freedom to live my life. Thank you is not enough but it is all I have. All my love and respect. ogersteiner@yahoo.com
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dEjz-wAQLSA&feature=PlayList&p=477CB1585D5551F3"
Scott Steiner of Worthington, OH USA
"To the family of Patrick McCaffrey: May God bless you and be with you....Patrick is in a better place and he will be in your hearts as well as mine. Remember the best times you've spent with him...therefore his memory will never be lost.
We lost our grandson May 29, 2004 in Iraq. They are all Hero's. "Some gave some, Some gave all""
Shirley Stark of Huntingdon Tennessee
"Charles J. Visiting a memorial site today for your son, brings me closer to feeling freedoms cost even more. He would have been two months older than me this year, and I hope another 33,000 people will visit to know the courage that his mother now shows in her ...struggle to help other veterans. The Valley Forge Center, to this veteran, represents hope for the many. We Thank your son for his sacrifice to our great nation, and your dedication to those who have carried Freedom's Torch into battle. God Bless"
Charles of California
"Thanks for being a hero
Randy Lange (HS classmate )
Patrick and Family
Thanks for your sacrifice--though it breaks my heart that you had to leave us so young and leave your family behind. I didn't know you personally but you have my ultimate respect. We went to HHS at the same time. Mei your soul now be at peace away from the craziness of the world.
All my Love and Respect"
Randy Lange of CA
"You are missed
/ Thomas Bennett (Friend)
I know it is Memorial Day, I knew it was coming. Somehow, on this day, it always hits me hard in the gut.
You are missed my Friend.
Sgt. T. Bennett"
T. Bennet of US
"May 24, 2009
Hey Patrick. I remember when we both joined the 579th. You crashed over at my place in Petaluma on that weekend drill. You were a pretty cool dude. I'm sorry you didn't make it out of Iraq. You and your family deserved better. Thinking of you on this Memorial Day Weekend. Semper Fi, buddy.
~ Kevin McNamara, Los Angeles, California"
Kevin McNamara of US
"A Friend From The Past...
Dearest Nadia,
You had been in my mind on and off since the tragic death of your beloved son Patrick.
I listened to you on NPR yesterday, my deepest condolences for the loss of your son.
On Monday, May 25th Veterans for Peace will have Arlington West in Oceanside, CA honoring our fallen soldiers. I will participate and will bring some flowers, and also I will say some prayers on your son's name.
Warmest regards from your long time Friend Silvia who onced visited you at your home in Sunnyvale, and I had the pleasure and honor of meeting your son Patrick.
Many hugs,
Silvia B."
Silvia B of US
"Thinking of you today
Good afternoon. My name is Cari and I was friends with Patrick in high school. You won't recognize my name or face. But he and I were friends throughout our years at Homestead. My maiden name is Mitzman, we ended up being together a lot as our last names were close together alphabetically. My mother met you and your son on an open house our freshman year. She came home and told me how nice he was and how polite he was and how handsome he was and wanted to know why I didn't talk about him when I came home! (It is exactly the reason that makes me think that he did not come home and talk about me!) But I wanted to let you know that he was a great friend of mine. Several of my family members are in the service and have been or are serving now in Iraq or Afghanistan. Please know how sorry I am for your loss, but how thankful I am to you for giving your son for my safety. I hold him in the highest regard. Know that my prayers are with you and the rest of your and his family.
Cari"
cari of US
"Nadia,
I wanted to see how some of my old friends were doing. I specifically wanted to see how Pat was doing. When I saw his picture online, I recognized his eyes and thought Wow, he's looking pretty good. Then I read the caption beneath the photo and cried at work.
Pat was a good friend to me in junior high. I wish we had kept in touch over the years.
Its been four years since he passed away. Its been at least twice as long since Pat and I last spoke.
I remember when he got his car in high school, a burly sports car to replace his old compact import wanna-be. He pulled up into my parents driveway and got out, beaming with pride. The only bad thing about the car was that it didn't quite have the pick he was expecting. My dad took a look at it and tweaked the timing. The car immediately revved with a larger-than-life roar. Pat was in awe and gave my dad a hug and then gave me a ride.
I have many memories of him. I wish I could do more than just share them.
My condolences to you and Robert.
Jim Mahoney"
Jim of SF Bay Area
"Holding You in my thoughts and prayers / Deb Estep (no)
Holding you in my thoughts and prayers.
The Wind on The Downs
“I like to think of you as brown and tall,
As strong and living as you used to be,
In khaki tunic, Sam Brown belt and all,
And standing there and laughing down at me.
Because they tell me, dear, that you are dead,
Because I can no longer see your face,
You have not died, it is not true, instead
You seek adventure in some other place.
That you are round about me, I believe;
I hear you laughing as you used to do,
Yet loving all the things I think of you;
And knowing you are happy, should I grieve?
You follow and are watchful where I go.”
(Written by Marian Allen during World War l )
Two lines that I wish you to keep near your heart…….
“You seek adventure in some other place.
That you are round about me, I believe”
I did not know Patrick, but I am remembering
his service. He is my hero. !
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
The Other Side
i'm over on the other side
where life and death softly divide.
left my skin and bones behind
now i'm over on the other side.
can you feel me there with you?
my breath is gone but i'm not through.
loved you then and i still do
from over on the other side.
i can fly. really fly.
below the earth ... all through the sky.
tell em all i did not die.
i'm just over on the other side.
it's good here on the other side.
the sweetest songs...the bluest skies.
thank you for the tears you cried
but it's good here on the other side.
i can fly. really fly. below the earth...all through the sky.
tell em all i did not die.
i'm just over on the other side
the world is smaller than a needle's eye.
where life and death softly divide.
when you leave your skin and bones behind
i'll be waiting on the other side.
i can fly. really fly. below the earth ... all through the sky.
go tell em all i did not die.
i'm just over on the other side.
Song lyrics by Don Conoscenti
C Desert Muse/SESAC
www.donconoscenti.com
(Used with permission)
“I hope it brings great comfort to any and all.
Peace on you. DonCon” 4-2008
The Other Side –
http://tinyurl.com/3o8gol
Sincerely,
Deb Estep ~ Ohio
Proud Air Force Mom and MIL
Remembering The Fallen – Blog
http://tinyurl.com/3z8p55
Angel and soldier drawing I have shared here.
http://tinyurl.com/6gey8b"
Deb Estep of Ho
"June 24, 2008
To the family of Sgt. Patrick R. McCaffrey, Sr.:
Patrick gave the ultimate sacrifice and will be held in the hearts of Americans forever. I cannot and will not let our fallen heroes be forgotten. My deepest sympathy to you. "Some gave all."
Peggy Childers
"Don't Let The Memory Of Them Drift Away"
www.IraqWarHeroes.org"
Peggy Childers of Carson City, NV
"Today in San Francisco, I had the duty of reading the names of my fellow Veterans who passed away while serving our country. I read the names of all those who died in June 2004. Among those was your name. I currently work with those Veterans that come home, and today was a time to remmeber those that did not make it home. You are truly a hero and my heart goes out to your family.
Kenneth Crawford"
Kenneth of San Francisco, CA USA
"To Patrick's mother, it has taken me so long to find the words to say how sorry I am about him. I met u briefly one day on Roosevelt when Pat had is as he called it his (muscle car,)So funny & so into making sure everyone else was ok, a shoulder to cry on, someone to laugh with, he was one that brightened my day. All the advice he had given me about do's & don'ts will not be forgotten. Our friendship was for a very long time even though we went to different schools. Him at Homestead and me at Fremont. The smile on his face, u got to love it. I have so much to say, but it hurts so much to know my friend is gone but not far away & to meet him in heaven,I can not wait for that day. So my condolences go out to his wife & kids,& from the pictures that I have seen are so beautiful & to u of course his dear mother that he talked so often of.
I will remember the smile he has & the one star that shines so bright knowing he is looking down on all he knows & loves so much. "God Bless You All""
Chrissy Loya of Sunnyvale, Ca
"Dear Sweet Patrick - Three years now, you are deeply missed by your family. Life goes on here, but for those who love you time has stopped in so many ways. Your Mother with the deep pain in her heart is in my prayers this day as she wakes to another day with out you her son. Continue to keep your arms of protection around her and your family. In peace and love,"
Lila Lipscomb, Mother of Army Sgt. Michael F. Pedersen, killed 4/2/03 Karbala Iraq of Flint, Michigan
"I never knew you, but I thank you for everything you did to keep our country free. You are a hero and will never be forgotten."
Sgt Strickland Michael/USMC of Manteca, California
"http://www.kcra.com/news/9411604/detail.html http://www.charlotte.com/mld/charlotte/news/nation/14875493.htm http://www.kstp.com/article/stories/S17086.html?cat=1 http://www.nbc4.tv/news/9405105/detail.html
Growing Military Family Movement Helps Returning Troops
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Ilona Meagher writes:
"There's a movement underfoot these days. Can you feel it? Families who've lost loved ones in the new century's wars are beginning to find creative solutions to problems that the underfunded VA (as professionally-manned as it may be) isn't able to solve for our returning troops. I reported on Sarah Farmer's Lehner Foundation earlier in the month; now there's news of another woman, Nadia McCaffrey, using her personal pain to find a way of giving returning troops a sanctuary from the din."
in Growing Military Family Movement Helps Returning Troops
"As painful as this time must be for McCaffrey, she's determined to do what she can to help other returning troops who are experiencing difficult readjustments to civilian life. Judging by the editorial board of the Tracy Press, she's on to something. McCaffrey's been inspired to act by one of her late son's Iraq battle buddies."
"Edward had PTSD, and his buddy's mother helped to set up a visit for him to the Zaltho Foundation in Oregon which offers a unique 4-day retreat for returning veterans (the next one scheduled to take place on November 16-19, 2006; email or call 503-636-8635 for more details)."
"I'll look into Nadia McCaffrey's plans for that farm retreat program, and see what more I can dig up. But, I want to commend people like her and Sarah Farmer for using their pain to ease that of those returning home and in need of our help."
THANKS ilona for continuing to advocate for veterans and their families!
Roerich Growing Military Family Movement Helps Returning Troops
There's a movement underfoot these days. Can you feel it? Families who've lost loved ones in the new century's wars are beginning to find creative solutions to problems that the underfunded VA (as professionally-manned as it may be) isn't able to solve for our returning troops. I reported on Sarah Farmer's Lehner Foundation earlier in the month; now there's news of another woman, Nadia McCaffrey, using her personal pain to find a way of giving returning troops a sanctuary from the din.
Click on 'Article Link' below tags for more...
First an editorial appearing in today's Tracy [CA] Press:
Sanctuary idea good for troops
Although it may have a fancy sounding name and acronym as post-traumatic stress disorder and PTSD, our troops are returning from war still shell-shocked.
It was that way during Vietnam, Korea and World War I and World War II. Even today, the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan are flaring up the PTSD in aging Vietnam veterans. The Department of Veteran Affairs says PTSD disability-compensation cases have nearly doubled since 2003 to more than 260,000. What may be happening is that many Vietnam veterans are reliving their own war trauma while watching or reading about the combat in Iraq and Afghanistan.
What we do know is that these flashbacks are striking America’s most recent war heroes, where the estimated risk of PTSD is 18 percent from Iraq and 11 percent from Afghanistan. Thirty percent of the 260,000 PTSD cases are Iraqi war veterans.
Our troops are reliving the nightmare of a war where there are no borders or uniforms worn by the enemy. The person standing next to you, whether a friend or a foe, might kill you, and sometimes himself or herself, too. No wonder our returning troops are edgy and many times unable to trust their families, friends and neighbors.
The mother of one of Tracy’s fallen soldiers, Nadia McCaffrey, wants to have sanctuaries for the returning members of our military. Her idea of civilian-run retreats across the country has merit. Our soldiers must have some vehicle to readjust so the symptoms of post-war stress can be controlled before becoming a psychological illness that further burdens VA medical care. We agree with McCaffrey that our war heroes need a place to heal their war wounds.
Nadia McCaffrey is back in the news two years after her son, National Guard Army Specialist Patrick McCaffrey, was killed while serving in Iraq. Only now, 9 months following the close of their investigation, is the DoD reporting to her (with no further explanation) that her son was actually killed by one of the Iraqi soldiers he was training. Senator Barbara Boxer today released papers to prove the charge, saying:
"The family was not told the truth," Boxer, D-Calif., told reporters during a conference call. "It's troubling that the Pentagon would withhold this information from the family. It's troubling that Specialist McCaffrey told his family that he had been attacked twice before by Iraqi soldiers. It's troubling that it took the involvement of a Senate office to get the autopsy and a written report about his death."
As painful as this time must be for McCaffrey, she's determined to do what she can to help other returning troops who are experiencing difficult readjustments to civilian life. Judging by the editorial board of the Tracy Press, she's on to something. McCaffrey's been inspired to act by one of her late son's Iraq battle buddies.
From the San Francisco Chronicle:"
Friend of CA
""We bedded down in some worn out foxholes. Everyone was scared and confused. No one knew who the enemy was. Why are we out here? Night was coming and death would be all around us. The guys and I slept close together. Once night came there was artillery fire all over us. The once black sky was now covered with bullets and tracers. I was the only one to stay down. Their bodies dropped like bricks, one by one. I was too scared to return fire. Where would I fire, they were everywhere. What could I do? I waited till morning Why wasn't I dead? Why didn't they come and finish me off? Were they tormenting me? I awoke to my friend’s dead faces. I cried in confusion. I didn't even bury them. I just ran away to nothing, when I arrived there I found no one except the emptiness in myself".....
Written by Patrick Ryan McCaffrey (1970-2004) at the age of 13 (1983)..."
Mom of CA
"“How Could They Do That”…
To Patrick Ryan McCaffrey
You train them and they shoot you in the back
You’ve even warned you think they will attack
But our country leaves you out there anyway
And with your life, you pay-
I knew you more than sixteen years ago
I was at the shop, during the earthquake
While you were on the road
We worked together ‘til I had a wreck
You were always protective, kind and showed respect-
How Could They Do That to you
Leave you out there
Unprotected, disrespected
And neglected-
How Could They Do That to you
When you had a family
You gave your all to a country
You thought you could trust
How Could They Do That to you
How Could They Do That to us…
You spoke highly of your mom
And I told you to walk the line
Be honest and be good, be respectful
To the women in your life-
Big sister to you, my little brother
We took our turns, it’s true
We were there for each other
I am really proud of you-
Life took us different ways
But I hope you know
You had to do
What you felt was right, in your soul-
How Could They Do That to you
Leave you out there
Unprotected, disrespected
And neglected-
How Could They Do That to you
When you had a family
You gave your all to a country
You thought you could trust
How Could They Do That to you
How Could They Do That to us…
I miss your smile
And your joking ways
I hadn’t seen you in years
But I’ll always see your face-
I hope that somehow, I’ll get
This to your mom
She’s so strong
And she’ll soldier on-
How Could They Do That to you
Leave you out there
Unprotected, disrespected
And neglected-
How Could They Do That to you
When you had a family
You gave your all to a country
You thought you could trust
How Could They Do That to you
How Could They Do That to us…
How Could They Do That to you
Their apology isn’t enough…
Copyright 2006 by Teresa M. McCarthy 06/23/06"
Teresa of CA
"It now appears that this man was killed deliberately and intentionally by Iraqis under US command. For the full story go here http://www.forbes.com/business/businesstech/feeds/ap/2006/06/20/ap2829105.html"
Jim Hoerst of Prescott, AZ
"Patrick, I know you are with my son Michael in Heaven just as I am with your mother here on Earth. I am so thankful to have her in my life, yet I hate that our hearts had to be bonded together in the death of our son's. I pray you and Michael continue to hold us in your arms as we continue on with the journies here. Nadia, hugs and love I send arcoss the country to you my friend. I am so proud of you and will always be here for you! In the struggle for Peace!"
Lila Lipscomb, Mother of Sgt. Pedersen, killed 4/3/2003 of Flint, Michigan
"Saint Patrick's day 2006. Dearest Patrick, sweet heart, we are missing you and loving you each day a little more, from your mom an family. Nadia McCaffrey"
N. McCaffrey of Tracy, Ca
"In your honor and with gratitude to you, Patrick Ryan McCaffrey Sr., I’ve planted a daffodil in your name, as have others across the United States as part of Project LIVE ON, a not-for-profit program founded to memorialize each U. S. military who has died in Iraq and Afghanistan.
Thousands of beautiful daffodils will come up each Spring, and, like your Spirit, will LIVE ON...and ON. Blessings to you, the family, as you grieve, and heal. For details, contact projectliveon@aol.com. Jan. 23, 2006."
Gretchen Forbes of the northcentral mountains of Pennsylvania
"I have planted a daffodil for you Patrick, along with 49 more bulbs to represent other soldiers who have been killed in Iraq. Your flower will be seen every year and your sacrifice remembered. Projectliveon@aol.com Projectliveon@aol.com"
Ruth Anderson of Mountain View , California
"To Nadia and the wife and children of Partick McCaffrey.
I just want to say that I am sadened by the death of your son, husband and father. I never met Patrick, but I knew him. He was a good friend to me, and when I heard of his death, I was so devistated. I cryed for weeks, couldnt believe this happened to him. He was a fine man, so full of love for his family and friends. He is truly missed, but I know Patrick is with the Lord now, watching and protecting his family and friends. God bless you."
Stella of central california
"So sorry to hear of your loss. I went to High School with and played football with Pat. I also lost another friend, Pat Tillman to the war. Please know that my thoughts are with you and that Pat will be missed."
Brian Halliwell of Hermosa Beach, CA
"To the family of Patrick R. McCaffrey, I am so sorry for the loss of your love one. HE died a hero defending freedom. May you have the peace and understanding that only comes from God. Prayfully we will all meet in Heaven one day where we will rest in the arms of Jesus. If you need prayer or need someone to talk to please call or write my pastor at Gateway Community Church: Rev. John Pearrell 11677 Brown Bridge Rd. Covington, Ga 30016 phone 770-787-1015. Your friend in Jesus Christ."
Polly Ballew of Covington, Ga.
"Nadia and Family, this message board is a wonderful thing. It has taken me awhile to truly put my thoughts together and memories to where I want to share of the love of a great friend. Patrick was one of my first friends and many who he knew later in his life may not have known him as I did when we were children. Patrick lived in the house behind my Grandma's in Sunnyvale on Roosevelt Street and always came to our family to share in with us and our parties, Christmas and Birthdays. Patrick and I would always play in Grandma's back bedroom with her multitude of thrift store toys that seemed like gold to us. We were friends, and the best kind of friends. Everytime My 2 Sisters Tammy and Wendy and my Cousin Kathy would be over Grandma would tell us to go into the back and get Patrick so he could join in the fun! Patrick always was a leader even as children, and so smart. He loved my Great Grandma and she loved him too. They always remembered Patrick at Chrsitmas with gifts, they loved him as their own. When Great Grandma died in March of 1985 Patrick and his Father Bob attended the funeral in San Jose and brought yellow roses, Great Grandma's favorite. He was always thoughtful and we have many happy memories of him in our childhood, always talented and speaking well of his Father and the many adventures traveling to see his Mother Nadia. He even gave me some Tahaitan Francs from one of his trips to which I still have and treasure to this day! He once had a yard sale and sold me a ventriliquist dummy to which at age 9 he wrote me out a receipt for the $7.00 I paid! He always knew how to take care and handle business, even as a child. I will always remember Patrick as a great childhood friend to which I share many memories and his dog LuLu!!!! His gentle Father Bob and beautiful Mother Nadia- My prayers are that God let him rest and that the world may know the sacrifice of this great person. My only goal is to continue to support Nadia in her efforts and Patrick's children in their future so they may know their Dad was a very awesome guy. My familys love to his."
Mark Nelson of Sacramento, California
"Thank you to Jenny Tmomsland of Manteca. Sergeant Patrick McCaffrey's wife is Silvia McCaffrey, I am his mom, Nadia McCaffrey. We now live in Tracy, not far from you, you are welcome to email or call, I would love to meet you. Nadia www.patrickspirit.org, nadiaiands@aol.com"
Nadia of Tracy, CA
"Nadia,
We have never met but I knew Patrick and went to elementary school with him.
Patrick and I met when we were in the 5th grade , we had every class together up until we graduated from 8th grade together.We ended up going to different high schools so we lost touch. But I have always thought about my friends from my childhood.
I came upon the news that Patrick died when reading the local paper. His picture is what caught my attention, I recognized him immediately . Even though we had not spoken in years it sadden me to hear a friend of mine had died.I consider myself lucky to have known Patrick. Your husband was a very good man. He will always be remebered and honored for his bravery and courage."
Jenny Tjomsland of Manteca, CA
"Patrick, Nadia, PJ and Janessa....
I met and immediately befriended Patrick in 1992 or 93 through his ex-wife. She was absolutely enamored by him for obvious reasons. Through their relationship and it's eventual demise he and I remained friends, even with relatively large breaks in time between our conversations. The day he told me the joined the National Guard was around the time we were having the Anthrax scares, no one, least of all me, believed he would be called to serve. He said it best when he told me "I did it in case [anyone] tries to invade us again." Always the hero. Proud of his weightlifting, in love with his children and always a smile in his voice. The last conversation we had I'll treasure forever, but wish I could change just enough to make it so I could see him just once more. He told me about being deployed about a month prior so this call was about the going away party he was having. He asked me to go so I could meet his new wife and little girl (both of our kids are close in age, his ex-wife in fact watched my daughter for a while even) I told him I couldn't make it but I would certainly love to throw him a welcome-home party, he said that I had better and that we would definitely keep in touch while he was there. E-mails were sporadic and I understood without question. I found out about his passing on the news and was truly devastated. I mourn my friend often, and remember his smile and laugh above all (and definitely will never forget his incessant preaching on the benefits of a good work-out at the gym!!). He will always be in my thoughts and prayers and will be remembered as my friend and a true hero. I'll be waiting to see your smile and hear your laugh, until you open up those gates for me. God Bless you Pat, Nadia and family.
Aurora
prprincess4_u@yahoo.com"
Aurora (Goss) Ortiz of San Jose, CA
"Please accept my deepest sympathy for the loss of your son. You and your family are in my prayers. I am friends with Sgt. Frank Papworth and his family. He is a soldier in your son's unit. I support the 579th Engineering Battalion based in Petaluma and I support everything they do."
Susan Johnson of Sonoma, Ca
"Hello,
I was in Basic Training and AIT with Patrick. He was a good soldier, a good leader, and a good friend. He will be dearly missed. I just found out about his passing recently, and it hit me really hard. I couldn't sleep right for a week, and still can't from time to time. I'm stationed in Iraq at the moment, and was told by another soldier who was in training with us. He had the same reaction when he found out. Patrick has had a lasting impact on our lives, and we'll never forget him. We thank him for the life he lived."
SPC Christopher Rusinko of Tallil Airbase, Iraq
"Nadia I met yo a few years ago at JFK University. You were giving a talk about Near Death Experiences and I brought a friend with me as well. I thought that I may have seen you a on TV some months ago, and I know it was you I saw this evening being interviewed by Ethan Harp. I was touched by your lifes work and story at JFK and now after hearing what happened with your son. It is no wonder that it is you, having been through this life of yours. Such strength you have..you have given so much. You are truly blessed, as you have said and demonstrated. I would love to cross paths with you again and
learn from you and with you. I work with older adults with dementia here in San Francisco. I wanted you to know that it was a magical moment to know that you touched many this evening, and my heart goes out to you and your family."
Heidi Wexler of Oakland, CA
"Mrs Nadia, my name is Jose. You met my wife and son a few times. Her name is Mary. I served with Patrick in the states. I was activated with a different unit and went to a different camp. I am sorry for the loss of your son. He was a great man. I was devastated to hear about his death. I remember when I first met him, he was at his first drill and everyone loved him. He was always smiling. I know that you have been told how great of a soldier your son was. I respect him and looked up to him. The reason he joined alone shows what kind of a man he was. He did not join for school or money like many others; he joined for the love of his country and I admired him for that. He is an inspiration to me and to every one that knew him. The last time I saw him was in Kuwait before we crossed the border. He told me to take extra care of myself because I have a son to come home to. I wanted to write to you and tell you how much he meant to me and everyone he served with. Patrick was a great friend and will always be remembered. Spc Jose Lau"
Jose Lau of Serving in Iraq
"To the family of Sergeant Patrick Ryan McCaffrey, after seing the show on Good Morning America, I did a search on google. I am so sorry to hear about his death. Thank you for the services that you and your son have given this country and your fellow human beings. I hope that your vast experience in this field helps you to cope with his loss. Again, very sorry and thank you for all the assistance you and your family have provided others."
"Sergeant Patrick McCaffrey was a natural leader. He looked after every one in the company, always asking how everyone was doing and helping them with their problems. SGT McCaffrey was a hard charger and very proactive . His leadership has nothing but great things to say about him, and all the soldiers considered him a friend. Many of the soldiers considered him a close friend and will miss him greatly. Even though we where all stricken by his loss, it is really hitting us hard. He was more than just a friend, to many of the soldiers, he was a Brother."
Chris of CA (Serving in Iraq)
"Dear Mrs McCaffrey, please accept my deepest sympathy over the loss of your son, Patrick. I saw a report on CNN about your son and your personal loss. I was brought to tears, and cannot quell them hours later. I was a paratrooper with the 173rd Airborne Brigade in Viet Nam duringt the 1960's. The 173ed is now stationed near Mosul, Iraq, 30+ years later. I lost several friends and others were devastatingly wounded. I mourn the loss of all "Brothers" in arm's and especially those who volunteered to go to war. I cannot know a mother's love nor grief, and know a soldier's heart. The pain goes on forever, and the only relief seems to be to honor their memory and live on as the fallen soldier would have whished us to. The relief is often transitory and fleeting, for the pain is so strong and grabs one at the strangest moments. An image, a smell, a sound or a touch can bring forth a flood of memories and tears. The image of your son touched me in just such manner.You son is dearly missed and will long be remembered by the band of Brothers". In Love and Peace. M.F.P."
Michael F.Popham of US
"WHAT IS A HERO? A man who gives himself at all times without question* A man that takes the heavy load when no one else can* A man that makes everyone around him feel special* A man everyone is proud to have known* A man that loves his family and thinks of them always* A man that runs to the aid of a fallen soldier* A man that is loved and respected by all that he meet* A man that is stronger than life itself* A man that no one will ever forget* A TRUE HERO IS SERGEANT PATRICK McCAFFREY* Jeanette Sarla"
A Friend of San Francisco
"This poem was forwarded to me and I am doing as it requested give my thanks and credit due to those who have made the ultimate sacrifice for their country and family.
MY SINCERE CONDOLENCES TO THE McCAFFREY FAMILY. HE WILL ALWAYS BE MISSED.
A Soldiers story
Subject: Twas The Night Before ChristmasTwas the night before Christmas, all is secure.
Twas the night before Christmas,
HE LIVED ALL ALONE,
IN A ONE BEDROOM HOUSE MADE OF PLASTER AND STONE.
I HAD COME DOWN THE CHIMNEY WITH PRESENTS TO GIVE, AND TO SEE JUST WHO IN THIS HOME DID LIVE.
I LOOKED ALL ABOUT, A STRANGE SIGHT I DID SEE, NO TINSEL,NO PRESENTS, NOT EVEN A TREE.
NO STOCKING BY MANTLE, JUST BOOTS FILLED WITH SAND, AND ON THE WALL PICTURES OF FAR DISTANT LANDS.
WITH MEDALS AND BADGES, AWARD OF ALL KINDS, A SOBERING THOUGHT CAME TO MY MIND.
FOR THIS HOUSE WAS DIFFERENT SO DARK AND SO DREARY, THE HOME OF A SOLDIER, NOW I COULD SEE CLEARLY.
THE SOLDIER LAY SLEEPING, SILENT, ALONE, CURLED UP ON THE FLOOR IN THIS ONE BEDROOM HOME.
THE FACE WAS SO GENTLE, THE ROOM IN SUCH DISORDER, NOT HOW I PICTURED A UNITED STATES SOLDIER.
WAS THIS THE HERO OF WHOM I JUST READ: CURLED UP ON A PONCHO, THE FLOOR FOR A BED?
I REALIZED THE FAMILIES THAT I SAW THIS NIGHT, OWED THEIR LIVES TO THESE SOLDIERS WHO WERE WILLING TO FIGHT.
SOON ROUND THE WORLD, THE CHILDREN WOULD PLAY, AND GROWNUPS WOULD CELEBRATE A BRIGHT CHRISTMAS DAY.
THEY ALL ENJOYED FREEDOM EACH MONTH OF THE YEAR, BECAUSE OF THE SOLDIERS, LIKE THE ONE LYING HERE.
I COULDNT HELP WONDER HOW MANY LAY ALONE, ON A COLD CHRISTMAS EVE IN A LAND FAR FROM HOME.
THE VERY THOUGHT BROUGHT A TEAR TO MY EYE, I DROPPED TO MY KNEES AND STARTED TO CRY.
THE SOLDIER AWAKENED AND I HEARD A ROUGH VOICE, "SANTA DONT CRY, THIS LIFE IS MY CHOICE; I FIGHT FOR FREEDOM, I DONT ASK FOR MORE, MY LIFE IS MY GOD, MY COUNTRY, MY CORPS".
THE SOLDIER ROLLED OVER AND SOON DRIFTED TO SLEEP, I COULDNT CONTROL IT, I CONTINUED TO WEEP.
I KEPT WATCH FOR HOURS, SO SILENT AND STILL, AND WE BOTH SHIVERED FROM THE COLD EVENINGS CHILL.
I DIDNT WANT TO LEAVE ON THAT COLD, DARK NIGHT, THIS GUARDIAN OF HONOR SO WILLING TO FIGHT.
THEN THE SOLDIER ROLLED OVER, WITH A VOICE SOFT AND PURE, WHISPERED, "CARRY ON SANTA, ITS CHRISTMAS DAY, ALL IS SECURE".
ONE LOOK AT MY WATCH, AND I KNEW HE WAS RIGHT. "MERRY CHRISTMAS MY FRIEND AND TO ALL A GOOD NIGHT".
THIS POEM WAS WRITTEN BY A MARINE STATIONED IN OKINAWA, JAPAN. CHRISTMAS WILL BE COMING SOON AND SOME CREDIT IS DUE TO OUR U.S. SERVICEMEN AND WOMEN FOR BEING ABLE TO CELEBRATE THESE FESTIVITIES. LETS TRY IN THIS SMALL WAY TO PAY A TINY BIT OF WHAT WE OWE. MAKE PEOPLE STOP AND THINK OF OUR HEROS, LIVING AND DEAD WHO SACRIFICED THEMSELVES FOR US.
SFC JAMES PECORARO"
MARIE L. JAUREGUI of SANTA CRUZ, CA USA
"Ms. Nadia-
I am so touched & impressed by your story... the story of your son. He represents the all that is great, good, & decent about America.
So much more a man than those posing as 'pious Americans' & sent him to that place. So much more than those that would deny him his full hero's return home.
God Bless you for your own bravery. Most of all- God Bless as you journey forth without Patrick.
I too served my country. Though not in a time of declared war. Perhaps there is always a sense of survivors' guilt to those of us that've thusly served. This, particularly in the case of Patrick, makes his passing all the more poignant. He gave so much to all around him- continually. One could only hope to be 1/10th so generous daily here Stateside."
Kelly Penney of Palestine, Ohio
"Mr. & Mrs. McCaffrey, as I have followed this presidential election process, I have learned so much more about the candidates and their possible motivations, and about this cruel war waged by the powerful and fought by our parents, our friends, our children. This war has made me feel incredibly fortunate that my two kids aren't in any way involved in the military... and so very pained and empathetic for all families whose children must fight.
Please accept my condolences, my deep respects, and my prayers for your son, your family, and his unit. I have been against this war from the beginning, but I have never been against our soldiers; they have done their duty, and they have served their country. As citizens we should all be--and are--very, very proud of them. I pray this atrocity will end soon, and that we'll be able to get our people out without causing even more hardship for the innocent civilians in Iraq. I pray that no more familes will suffer the loss I am sure you have suffered. God bless you."
Christine Casey Logsdon of Santa Barbara, CA
"hello my name is spc jasonne york. iam currently serving in iraq. MacCaffrey was in my company. he was a great person always wanting to help others. we would sit in the chow hall and talk about home and what each of us were going to do when we got home. i saw him the night befor he pasted. we walked by eachother he said hi and i said hi. i wish i would have stoped him and just started talking to him. i am very sorry for his familys loss but he is still with everyone in our hearts and watching over us."
spc york jasonne of chico ca usa
"hello my name is spc jasonne york. iam currently serving in iraq. MacCaffrey was in my company. he was a great person always wanting to help others. we would sit in the chow hall and talk about home and what each of us were going to do when we got home. i saw him the night befor he pasted. we walked by eachother he said hi and i said hi. i wish i would have stoped him and just started talking to him. i am very sorry for his familys loss but he is still with everyone in our hearts and watching over us."
spc york jasonne of chico ca usa
"TO THE MCCAFFREY FAMILY ALL OUR PRAYERS AND THOUGHTS ARE WITH YOU THE DEVASTATION YOU HAVE EXPERIENCED CAN ONLY BE KNOWN BY THOSE WHO HAVE EXPERIENCED THE SAME I DON'T KNOW THAT BUT I DO KNOW JUST HOW DEVASTATING PATRICK'S DEATH IS I AM THE MOTHER OF THE SOLDIER WHO DID ALL HE COULD TO SAVE PATRICK'S LIFE HE IS MOURNING PATRICK LIKE HE WAS HIS OWN BROTHER AND WILL NEVER FORGET THE HERO IN PATRICK IN HIS WORDS THE TRUE HERO'S ARE THOSE WHO GAVE THEIR ALL AS PATRICK DID HE WILL NEVER BE FORGOTTEN"
SOLDIERS MOM of VA BEACH
"WOW.........this poem entitled "Tomorrow" really hit home....it was a healing 2 the soul! Thank U whoever wrote this 4 it is unique......special and true. Thank U again Ms. Nadia for UR words and encouragment 2!"
A Close Friend of Patrick of Sunnyvale, CA. USA
"Thank you brave soldier for sacrificing your today for my children's safer tomorrow. You have our utmost respect and gratitude. May God provide your family with comfort in their time of sorrow. May you forever rest in Heavenly peace. Neither you nor your sacrifice will be forgotten. For the family/friends: May time provide happy loving memories in place of present sorrows. God Bless you and thank you."
a grateful family in arizona
"A Poem for Patrick's family, entitled" Tomorrow"
Tommorow
When tomorrow starts without me
And I'm not there to see
If the sun should rise and find your eyes
All filled with tears for me
I wish so much you wouldn't cry
The way you did today
While thinking of the many things
We didn't get to say
I know how much you love me
As much as I love you
And each time that you think of me
I know you'll miss me too
But when tomorrow starts without me
Please try to understand
That an angel came and called my name
And took me by the hand
And said my place was ready
In heaven far above
And that I'd have to leave behind
All those I dearly love
But when I walked through heaven's gates
I felt so much at home
When God looked down and smiled at me
From His great golden throne
He said "This is eternity
And all I've promised you"
Today for life on earth is past
But here it starts anew
I promise no tomorrow
For today will always last
And since each day's the same way
There's no longing for the past
So when tomorrow starts without me
Don't think we're far apart
For every time you think of me
I'm right here in your heart"
R.B. of Washington, DC
"To the family of Sgt. P. R. McCaffrey:
I was lucky enough to meet your son during AIT Training at Fort Leonard Wood Missouri last year. Before McCaffery came to our Company I was the oldest soldier at 28 years old, and then Pat joined us. It was a relief to have someone with a head on his shoulder, someone who cared for all of us at C Co Eng 35th. Pat had united all of us when the times where needed. He was a unselfish individual, who put everyone before himself.
Your Son, Husband, and father was a true hero and a leader. I send my blessings to the family.
God Bless America,"
Jason Oliver of Troy, New York
"My name is Nadia McCaffrey, I am Patrick's Mom, Thank you so much every one for the very touching messages to Patrick's Memory and Spirit and his Family. My road is long and uncertainty will be part of my new path without Patrick. I miss my Darling son, more than I can say or express. But now I have a new mission, helping our soldiers in Iraq and keep alive all the sacrifices offered to our beloved country. Patrick cared dearly for his fellow soldiers, the children of Iraq, his family and all his friends, Patrick also cared about people that he had never seen, and offer his help to them time after time. I always will keep him close within my heart and my soul. Thank you my son for your peaceful and caring soul, thank you for having me as your mother. My love fly with you, my Son. Nadia"
Nadia McCaffrey of Tracy, CA
"Nadia, I watched you on CNN and I am in tears. The same way I was in tears when I say Michael Pederson's mother, Lila, in so much pain in the documentary, Farenheit 9/11. I am so sorry for your pain and wish I could take it away. My thoughts are with you and your family and I appreciate the sacrifice your son, Patrick has made. May he rest in peace"
Barbara of Alexandria, VA
"I just saw the CNN piece on your son/husband/father and was very moved. I will keep your family in my prayers.
I'm so sorry Patrick was lost and am very grateful for his service and dedication.
I am working very hard to ensure our service people are not again sent in harm's way for no good reason ... Patrick--and the others--did not die in vain."
Susan of San Diego
"Specialist McCaffrey, goodbye soldier and thank you. You are my hero."
Bill of Houston, Texas
"I want to express my deep sadness for your loss. I hope that you know that thousands of humans across the planet are working hard to make sure that no more good young men and women die in the name of capitalism. Time heals. My best to you and your family."
Karin Chrostowski of Excello, MO/USA
"Patrick was one of my good friends and he will be missed greatly. He had great integrity, honor and a love for his family and country.
Though I didn't like his decision to join the military I respected it because his main focus was to make a better place for his children the love and light of his life! He truly was a great man and I am a better person for knowing him."
Barney of CA
"TO THE FAMILY OF PATRICK McCAFFREY;
I DIDN'T KNOW YOUR SON BUT A GOOD FRIEND OF MINE DID ANDRE TYSON, YOU SEE HE WAS ALSO KILLED ON THAT DAY AND I KNOW EVEN THOUGH PATRICK WAS HURT HE TRIED TO HELP MY GOOD FRIEND, THANK YOU FOR BRINGING UP A SON LIKE PATRICK. THESE TWO SOLDIERS ARE TOGETHER NOW. GOOD NIGHT PATRICK SLEEP WITH THE ANGLES. THANK YOU FOR TRYING TO HELP ANDRE. MICHELLE"
MICHELLE of LOS ANGELES, CA.
"To the family of Patrick McCaffrey,
You are in our prayers. We share in your loss. Thank you for your son and husband's sacrifice.
parents of SSG Steven H Bridges KIA Iraq December 8, 2003 now home with our Lord"
Loretta and Sheldon of Tracy, CA
"I thank Patrick too late for his service, but I pray he, and you as his family, know that his sacrifice will always be remembered. Thank you."
Shannon L. Deese of MCAS New River, NC
"To Patrick's Family and Friends:
On behalf of the Blanco-Caldas family, we send our sincerest condolences. We share the same loss ... the same pain. Our prayers are with you in this most difficult time and we thank you for his bravery and sacrifice.
Sincerely,
The Family of Capt. Ernesto M. Blanco-Caldas, 82nd Airborne
KIA Iraq 12/28/2003.
Gloria Caldas (Ernie's mom) of San Antonio, TX
gloria.caldas@banksterling.com"
"To Patrick's Family:
There are no words to express the sorrow we feel for your loss. May God bless you and help you through this time."
Dan and Meg Manninen of San Antonio, Texas
"We Will NEVER FORGET !"
Please KNOW so many people share your sadness, and we are remembering your family in your loss and your deep grief. Your HERO, Patrick, will be remembered by name. Our thoughts and prayers are with you. God Bless you. Pat & Sandi Breckenridge from Montana "
"Thank you Patrick McCaffrey, Sr., you will not be forgotten. Your bravery goes beyond words. I want to express my deepest gratitude for your sacrifice. To the family and friends, my prayers and deep condolences in your loss. May God strengthen you from knowing that fellow Americans and people around the world care about you and grieve with you in your loss. God bless you all. A very appreciative fellow American,"
Leo Titus of Grayslake, Illinios
"To the family and friends of Spc. Patrick McCaffrey, Sr.:
May God's grace be with you during your time of grief. Please know that our thoughts and prayers are with you and we feel your loss and share in your sorrow. Bless Patrick for the sacrifice he has made to make a better life for the rest of us."
The Ford Family of Wells, Nevada
"To the family and friends of Spc. Patrick McCaffrey, Sr.:
I am saddened by the loss of your loved one. He will always be remembered as a hero for fighting for freedom. I hope that this website will be a source of comfort and encouragement for you during this difficult time, and in the future as you recall the memories of Patrick, who continues to live on in your heart."
Tim Rivera of Powder Springs, Georgia